Riddles and Ciphers

First meeting of “People Who Talk Funny Anonymous”

JK: Abe’e see d’ apogee age? [Abe looks at his shirt for missing nametag.] I “JK”!
Abe: Well… am in ‘ope y curiosity… [turns to V, who has just joined them]…you, V?
V: Double. You wax wise. [passes around picture of the wife and kids] See?

He will be here:

He will be here, DJ, through FM and AM.
He will be here, JJ, through the events of A SON.

To what “events” are the capital letters (besides H) a clue?

Misplaced:

Yjrdr yjomhd O jsbr d[plrm yp tpi
dp yjsy om

Om yjr ept;f tpi jsbr ytoni;syopm 
niy yslr vpitshr
 
O jsbr pbrtvp,r yjr
 ept;f
Who said it? What are the symbols for the letters of the alphabet that have not been used (if you crack the cipher, a little bit of thought about what connects the symbols representing the letters that ‘are’ used will lead you to that answer)?

RBI

Crack the cypher (pretty simple), then solve the riddle.

1 007′1 8474 224432, 861 1751340 1 43.
1 6034021 470 7062158 4 12651179 7438.
224
1377 813 04 3841 406 2306351 17 33
061 7060 02 17 517371 507170064.

Tell it:

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